It's been a busy few weeks. I've been doing lots of speaking. Breakfast seminars, webinars, and then a conference. I'm all networked out.
Actually, I detest networking and am not the best at it. I'm more the technical sort of lawyer. Delivering a talk on something tricky? No problem. Distributing business cards after? *Shudders* It's not that I'm anti-social. It's just I can't do that ruthlessly effective thing of hunting down who you really need to speak to, discarding others on the way.
The conference I was at exemplifies this perfectly. I kept ending up talking to people who I had no prospect in getting any work from. Firstly a very nice American woman who'd been invited by the conference organisers to see how public sector lawyers do things here. No chance of any work coming from her but we had a great chat (me quizzing her on how the layers of government work in the US). Then a retired investigator (fascinating anecdotes re investigations vs public officials) then a retired chief exec (what is a 'good life' - getting deep and philosophical over the lunch buffet). This poor networking effort (but interesting day) culminated in me sitting next a woman at dinner who was hilariously unlikely to ever give my firm work - she was the ex wife of our chairman. But she was interesting and funny and dry and dinner ended up being great fun.
So do I count it a success or a failure? How would you view it?
I also network, I suppose, through the world of reader blogs. It's not, perhaps surprisingly, an entirely different proposition. And actually, thinking about it, I take a pretty similar approach, displaying a marked lack of talent at the activity, but having a whale of a time in the process. Other bloggers seem to do the networking thing so much better than me. I've sat here for five whole minutes wondering why. Maybe it's because I'm more fixated on the content of the conversation than on the participants?
But enough about me, what about you? Do you blog and comment for the discussion itself or for the contact with the participants? Or is a mixture of both?
This post was originally going to be about the a very specific type of happiness that feels like running towards something, and at its zenith, standing on the lip of something, ready to fall in. To that end, I embedded the wonderful song below by Stornoway who are my band of the moment. And I love it so much, I refuse to remove it despite its complete lack of relevance to what I've just been talking about. (If you like it, check out Zorbing too.)
Posts
6 comments:
"Distributing business cards after? *Shudders*"
Oh, I agree. So much. It's the crucial part of my work, but I can't stand it. Can't STAND it. It's easier in Japan (giving a card during an introduction is almost the norm), but so awkward in Britain. When to do it? At the start, during, or at the end? Or wait until the other offers his/hers first? Or should it depend on the conversation? I could never know when is the right time. Agh.
As for going after the ones we need to talk to? Awkward. I usually shuffle, crab-like, until I'm near enough to flash a friendly (a.k.a. 'hello... please say hello back!') smile. 60% it worked, the rest? Nope.
Yes, I generally do not like networking, which is pretty insane, considering the fact I'm a freelancer. *headdesk*
"So do I count it a success or a failure? How would you view it?"
A success. Some might remember you well enough to suggest you when an occasion calls for it. I gained some of my work this way.
I once was asked to do an awesome project by a person whose wife turned out to be the one I helped during a bomb evacuation at Holborn tube station. (She was heavily pregnant and she had a very active three-year-old with her). So I gave her a card in case she needed my help again later that day. Her husband got in touch to say thanks and somehow, the call ended with a work offer. Nice. *thumbs up* :D
"Other bloggers seem to do the networking thing so much better than me. I've sat here for five whole minutes wondering why. Maybe it's because I'm more fixated on the content of the conversation than on the participants?"
Well, IMO, there are two types: those who focus on participants regardless of content, and those who focus on content, regardless of participants. The most successful ones seem the latter.
Oh, and there is the third type: respond to everything and anything, regardless of participants and content, as a bid to publicise enough to brand everyone's eyeballs with his or her name. This is similar to certain networkers in real life, giving everyone their business cards. Anywhere, anytime.
Off the top of my head, I'd say that I read blogs primarily for the content. But when I thought for a moment, I'd have to concede that I respond to different blogs in different ways, and thus contact with a specific communicator in communications-- which will probably never be anything but exchanges of words-- has something to do with it. At times, I find it a bit spooky.
dick
I'm terrible at networking, being shy, and now you've got me thinking about how that relates to the weird social anxiety I can feel when navigating bloglandia.
"Stornaway" is the name of the residence of the leader of the opposition in Canada.
I always mean to be ruthlessly efficient in my networking at conferences and/or blogs, but I'm always a sucker for a good time. I can't say I've never had a great conversation that's turned out to be good for my career, but it never seems to be the point at the time.
dick - I think it's fascinating how much of the personality does come across in online communications. How much tone there is in quite short comments.
Liz - see above! One of the things that attracted me to blogging was the (false) idea I had about being able to be a different person. I'm not at all. I'm exactly the same, with all the same anxieties and sensitivities, that I am in real life.
Miranda - true that.
FiaQ - for some reason your comment ended up in my spam folder - where no comment has ever gone before! No idea why. Anyway, it's good to know I'm not the only one who finds networking such a trial. I'm at another conference in London this week so am trying to steel myself all over again...
Post a Comment